Isabella Marie Swan

[Bella Swan]

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Isabella Marie Swan

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" I don't know how it gets bettter that this
you take my hand and pull me head first, fearless
and I don't know why but with you
i'd dance in a storm in my best dress, fearless"[/center]

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MYCBOXNAMEIS : Bella
HOWDIDYOUFINDUS?: I was given the link
IALSOPLAY: none atm

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MYNAMEIS : isabella marie cullen
CALLME : bella, bells

IAM : eighteen
BORNON : september 13, 1987

GENDER: female
ILIKE : boys
SPECIES : human

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MYTWIN : kristen stewart

HOWTALL : 5'5"
IWEIGH : 110 pounds
MYHAIR : Brown, straight and long, coming down to the middle of her back
MYEYES : chocolate brown
THEFACE : A heart shaped face with a widow's peak. Prominte cheek bones and a thin nose. She has a narrowed jaw with a pointed chin, also she has very full lips.
THEBODY : Bella's body is slender, but she's not at all muscular.
SPECIAL : The scar on her hand where she was bitten by James

ABOUTME :
Bella overall is a very kind person, she puts the needs of others before her own. For those she loves she would just about do anything. Her biggest flaw has to be her lack of self confidence, she’s brave but she doesn’t think all that highly over herself. She is plain, boring and average so it makes no sense to her as to why someone like Edward would want anything to do with her. She is a very good person, but if you asked her she wouldn’t agree with that. She always focuses upon her flaws instead of the positive things about herself.

She is very quiet, but very stubborn. She loves to use sarcasm and anyone who can handle this. She gets very close with people and this sometimes isn't the greatest, for when they leave her it will hurt all the more. She is very smart and will take the hardest classes at school. She is clumsy which at times will cast her into a 'damsel in distress' situation. She is easily embarrassed, and she hate it when she blushes which happens quite frequently.

Her mind is very private, it’s the only place where no one can get to her. For some reason(her thoughts that there’s something wrong with her brain) she is immune to all mental vampire abilities. Edward cannot read her mind, which is one thing that she simply adores. Though her Mother refers to her as a open book simply because her face practically shows you what she is thinking and feeling.

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ILOVE : 5+ likes

• EDWARD
  
• JACOB
  
• HER FAMILY
  
• BOOKS
  
• THE SUN
  

IHATE : 5+ dislikes

• THE VOLTURI
  
• RAIN
  
• LOSING EDWARD
  
• BEING UNABLE TO LIE
  
• HURTING THOSE SHE CARES ABOUT
  
• SHOPPING
  

DONTTELL : 2+ secrets

• SHE KNOWS ABOUT VAMPIRE...AND IS IN LOVE WITH ONE, PLUS HER BEST FRIEND IS A WEREWOLF...WAY TOO MUCH FOR ONE PERSON TO HANDLE.
  
• SECRETLY SHE IS WORRIED ABOUT BECOMING A VAMPIRE
  

SCAREDOF : 3+ fears

• LOSING EDWARD
  
• SOMEONE GETTING HURT BECAUSE OF HER
  
• CARING ABOUT NOTHING BUT BLOOD ONCE SHE BECOMES A VAMPIRE
  

GOODSTUFF : 3+ strengths

• BRAVE
  
• SELFLESS
  
• CARING
  
• LOYAL
  

BADSTUFF : 3+ weaknesses

• EDWARD
  
• CLUMSY
  
• BAD LIAR
  
• STUBBORN
  

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BORNIN : forks, washington
LIVINGIN : forks, washington

MOMMY : renee dwyer, 40, alive
DADDY : charlie swan, 43, alive
THESIBLINGS : none
OTHERHALF : edward cullen, 107, alive
THEKIDS : None

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FULLHISTORY:
Bella was born on September 13, 1987 to Renee and Charlie Swan, a young couple living in the small town of Forks, Washington. Bella's parents divorced when Bella was six months old, and Renée took Bella with her when she moved to Phoenix, Arizona. Very little of Bella's life in Phoenix is mentioned, although she does allude to not fitting in very well at her old school, never having any romantic relationships or many friends, and that she spent a lot of time with her mother. She mentions briefly taking piano lessons, which she complained about until her mother let her discontinue her lessons, and having (and killing) a few pet fish - three in a row. It is also known that she used to take ballet lessons in a studio near her house, and that she wasn't very good; she was always placed, to Bella's relief, in the back at recitals. Bella is also known to have visited Forks in her past to spend time with Charlie. During these occasions, she also spent time with Rachel, Rebecca, and Jacob Black, the children of Charlie's friend Billy Black.


Everything changed when Bella’s Mother marries Phil Dwyer, a minor league baseball player who is much younger than herself. Phil travels a lot due to his profession, and Bella notices how much her mother wants to be with him while he travels. So, to make it easier for them, Bella moves back to her birth town of Forks, Washington, to live with her father Charlie Swan. She enrolls at Forks High School. She does not notice the physical attraction she holds for the males at the school. She makes a few new friends, including Jessica Stanley, Angela Weber, and Mike Newton.


The one group of people at Forks High School that truly intrigues Bella are the Cullens, a mysterious family consisting of five adopted children. Edward Cullen, in particular, captures her attention. His adopted siblings being are Alice- a petite girl with black, pixie-cut hair, who has the ability to see the future; Jasper, her husband, who has the hardest time in the family abstaining from human blood; Emmett, a broad, extremely muscular vampire, who is married to Rosalie, a beautiful, self absorbed woman.
As the story progresses, Bella finds out from a family friend, Jacob Black, that the Cullens are supposedly vampires. However, they are different from other vampires in that they are "vegetarians", meaning they choose not to drink the blood of humans, but instead live off of animal blood. Edward and Bella get to know each other better, it is hard for Edward to be near her, because he feels a particular draw to the scent of her blood. Although he does not drink human blood, Edward constantly lusts for it, and Bella's blood is especially tantalizing for him. He must constantly control his desire. He also finds that his mind reading capabilities do not work on her.


Despite his desire for her blood, Edward and Bella fall passionately in love. Edward introduces her to his family, and soon after she is invited to watch their baseball game. During the game, danger reveals itself in the form of a visiting vampire coven consisting of Laurent, Victoria, and James. Victoria's mate, James, is a sadistic tracker vampire who has set his sights on killing Bella. He tricks her into coming to her old ballet studio with the sound of her mother's voice, and the Cullen family must rush to Bella's aid. They destroy James before he can kill her, though the other vampires of his coven, Victoria and Laurent, run and survive. Bella spends time in a hospital with Edward constantly by her side, where he admits that his sister Alice saw a vision of Bella becoming a vampire. However, he is determined to keep her human, despite her own determination to become a vampire.

Edward takes Bella to their high school prom, despite her broken leg and angry protests. There are high levels of tension as he turns to action, caused by Edward and Bella's differences of opinion about turning Bella into a vampire. Bella is determined to be with Edward forever, but at the age of 17. Edward wants her to have a normal human life, in other words saying that he will love her at any condition, mortal or not.


Then it all changed on Bella's 18th birthday. Bella is especially upset because it is the day that she becomes older, physically, than Edward, who will always be 17. It didn't help that she also had a nightmare, where she was with, what she thought to be her Grandma Marie, after whom she was partly named, turned out to be her. Edward came to her side in the dream and was just as young and flawless as always. Edward persuades her to come to his house on the evening of her birthday for a party thrown by his sister, Alice Cullen. Bella receives a paper cut while opening one of her gifts, drawing a single drop of blood and causing Edward's brother, Jasper Hale, to try to attack her. Edward, in the process of defending Bella from Jasper, throws her into a table filled with crystal, which results in Bella getting a deep cut from her wrist to her elbow. Although Bella's injuries are not life-threatening, Edward later decides that she would be safer without him, his family, and his dangerous style of life, so he deceives Bella into thinking that he does not love her any longer and leaves Forks with his family.


Bella sinks into a deep depression for four months, until she is 'awoken' by Charlie Swan, her father. He threatens to send her back to live with her mother in Jacksonville, Florida because he is worried about her behavior. To appease her father, she tries to engage in normal, teenage-like behavior. She invites her friend Jessica to go to Port Angeles with her for dinner and a movie. While there, she carelessly approaches four men standing outside a bar. This results in her hearing Edward's voice inside her head, warning her to turn around. Bella soon realizes that whenever she puts herself in a dangerous situation, she can hear Edward's voice with perfect clarity.



With this discovery in mind, Bella seeks out Jacob Black and convinces him to fix a motorcycle for her and teach her how to ride. Jacob and Bella become friends, when suddenly Jacob refuses to answer any of her calls and asks her not to come to his house anymore. It is not until a two weeks later that Bella learns what has happened to her friend: he has become a werewolf and is avoiding Bella for her own safety. She also learns that Victoria has returned to kill her, out of revenge for Edward killing Victoria's mate, James. Bella and Jacob reconcile, and she assists his werewolf pack of brothers in hunting down Victoria.


To hear Edward's voice again, Bella attempts cliff-diving and nearly drowns. When Alice, who has the power to see the future, sees Bella jump, she believes Bella had committed suicide and subsequently returns to Forks. Edward, isolated from his family by his own volition, is told by Rosalie, his other adopted sister, that Bella is dead. Alice finds Bella and tells her that Edward is going to Volterra, Italy to ask the Volturi to kill him, because he believes Bella to be dead. Bella and Alice quickly pursue Edward to Italy, and stop him from being killed. Afterwards they are brought to speak with the Volturi, where they make a promise to change Bella into a vampire so that they can be let free.


Back in Forks, Edward explains why he had to leave and begs her forgiveness. He tells her that he loves her and had always loved her, and promises to never leave her again. When Edward once again refuses to transform Bella into a monster, she decides to let his family decide whether she should become a vampire and thus join their family. All except Edward and Rosalie vote affirmatively for her to be changed. Edward later agrees to change her himself if she agrees to marry him first. Later, Jacob meets with Edward and Bella to remind Edward and his family of the treaty made between the Cullens and the La Push werewolves, which states that no Cullen may bite a human. Bella is thus left in a difficult position: if she does not become a vampire, the Volturi will come to kill her. However, if the Cullens do make her a vampire, they will have broken their treaty with the La Push werewolves, which would start a war with the Cullens.

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RPSAMPLE:

With Edward, it was like a double sided coin. It was impossible to be happy, to have all the good things, without taking all the bad things that came with it. But in this case, she was all the bad things. Nearly, no really all of the problems, one way or the other, all began because of her. It wasn’t fair…Edward was such a good person. So caring, intelligent, and brilliant; even as a human…he would always be so much better than she. So…why he loved her so much, it never really made any sense to Bella. There were millions of girls, so many better suited for him and yet, he wanted her. A plain, ordinary girl…her positive qualities were average. But her bad traits, the fact that she was a danger magnet and a klutz and an overall selfish person, they were above and beyond the norm…. What was she supposed to do now, how on earth could she possibly fix this. At the moment she should be down on the ground, begging for his forgiveness, begging for him to let her stay. She didn’t deserve him in her life to be quite honest, what she did deserve, however, was for Edward to kick her out. To tell her that he wanted nothing to do with her and then never let her see her son again. Bella’s heart throbbed at the thought. The simple idea of never seeing Edward or Ej….it was enough to crush her soul. And really, that would be what would happen to her.


She had to get rid of that thought even though it was very possible. Or at least it really would only be what she deserved. But…she knew no matter what she did, Edward would never do that to her…. No matter how much part of her wanted him to. She hated hurting Jacob, but she hated causing Edward pain even more. He believed in her, trusted her and yet she always seemed to go behind him back and hurt him somehow. She didn’t mean to cause people pain, she was the only one who should suffer and yet she always seemed to drag everyone else down with her. It wasn’t fair…but then again when was it ever fair? She couldn’t help but wonder…a tiny part of herself at least, how things would have turned out if she’d never been born…or simply if she hadn’t moved to Forks. She wanted to believe everyone’s lives would have been better but she was a selfish person after all and she couldn’t bring herself to do that.

To be here in his arms, it was a comfort and yet it only made her feel that much more horrible about all of this. Feeling guilty wasn't going to make anything better. After all, if she could only be faithful, she wouldn't have to feel this way. There wasn't a doubt within Bella, she knew that she loved Edward with everything that she was. But she was simply unable to say goodbye to Jacob. And until she did... Edward would never truly trust her again.

God. She just wanted to scream, what was she supposed to do. How could Edward possibly ever forgive her. Maybe she knew that he would and that's why she was so upset...because she didn't deserve his forgiveness. There was only one thing she could do and....she just couldn't. Jacob....No, she couldn't. He had to be a part of her life. Anymore it really was impossible to see how, but she still cared so much about him. He was her best friend and even if she tried to deny it, she really did love him. That love though was nothing like what she felt for Edward, but it was enough to cause both Edward and Jacob pain. She knew in reality if she just left them both, everyone would eventually be ok. Didn't they deserve to be happy more than she?

Bit she bit her lower lip, breathing in slowly. Trying so desperatly to calm herself down. Getting upset like this, the only thing she'd get was Edward's sympathy. Truly it was something that she didn't deserve. He was trying to comfort her and make her feel better. She wanted to sigh, but not a single sound escaped her lips. For at the moment she was choking back another sob. This was the first time that she truly missed being a vampire. How she'd been able, for that short period of time, to hide her emotions. Not everything she was feeling was written out on her face clear for the world to see. But now, being the 'open book' she could only imagine what her face and even her eyes showed Edward. That was the reason why she was trying her hardest not to look at him. Her attetion on the floor, the walls, any random piece of furniture.


There had to be something internally wrong with her, her life up untill this point. for the past few months really, it had been perfect. Not one was after her family, and nothing stood in the way of her life with Edward. But of course, she wasn't happy with that... Well she was, but for some reason she had to make a problem of something. And with that thought she had to force herself back to reality. She really needed to stop this and now. All she was doing was feeling sorry for herself instead of trying to think of how to make things ok again.

Bella was honestly tempted to speak again, she needed to say something. This silence was really going to drive her insanse. She parted her lips, taking in a small breath as she prepared to talk. But then, she stopped, her words cut off at the feel of Edward's hand against the side of her face. Her two main reactions at the moment were to wince and/or pull away from him. But somehow she'd stopped from doing either. If she'd reacted like that...what would he have thought about that. Did it matter though, what could she do now that would ever make him think less of her. She loathed the fact that she truly knew, no matter what, he'd never hate her.


"Shh, my love." The sound of his voice, it was so soothing to her and yet it made her hate herself that much more. She wanted to forget all of this and act as if nothing was wrong, but, that was truly impossible to do. She bit her lip, to keep quite. She'd already began to cry, something she'd promised herself she wouldn't do. She needed to pill herself together. Take whatever punishment she was going to get with dignity. After all whatever Edward decided, it would of course only be what she deserved. He then pulled her closer to him, and tucked her head beneath his own. Rocking them both gently back and forth, she allowed herself to remain here. Despite how much she wanted to pull away, she knew she didn't have anywhere close to that type of will power.


"You can have whatever you want. Just be happy. You have every right to be here. You also had every right to see him." Even though she had expected him to say something along the lies of this. She still couldn't stop herself from feeling the pain and the guilt that went along with those words. She quickly shook her head back and forth, her eyes closing for a moment. "No. No....I know what I want you but...I don't deserve you, I never have and we both know that I never will..." She cut herself off, stooping only when he led her towards the couch. Her body was physically and emotionally drained but sleep was beyond impossible in a moment like this.


With both of them on the couch, she could not find the will to even want to pull away. With him holding her so close again, she wanted to act as f nothing was wrong. She didn't want to cause all of these problems but it was like she honestly had no other choice... No say in the matter. "You love us both, I realize that. I should not have thought that a ring would be the end of it. From my own perspective, I suppose that I found everything impossibly perfect. I had not given as much thought to yours and Jacob's relationship and that is entirely my fault." Why...why did he always do that to her? It was her fault, it always was and yet...somehow he always found a way to make himself believe that it was in fact, his fault. She pushed against his chest, moving back so that she could look up at his face. "Stop!" She snapped, for the first time not really caring if she raised her voice or not, she was beyond sick of him always going so easy on her, she didn't deserve his kindness or his forgiveness. "Please, just stop doing this to me. This is all my fault and no one else. Not yours. Not Jacob's. It's mine. And what you expected our wedding, us getting married should have been the end of it. Edward I love you....and you alone....You're the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. If I wasn't one hundred percent sure of that, I wouldn't have agreed to marry you. So please, stop being so understanding. I'm a horrible person, why can't you just see that?!"" Her voice was louder at first but as she continued her voice slowly began to fade until it was barely audible when she finished. So many times she'd nearly lost control of herself. Her shoulders had begun to shake lightly but this time she'd managed to keep from crying.

"Bella, I can let you go. I know you love me, but if there is a chance you love him more, well then I cannot hold you back." With those words....to be quite honest it felt as if he'd taken a knife and plunged it straight into her heart. Really that pain would have hurt less than what she felt now... He could let her go....? Even if it was just a statment...she couldn't bare to hear those words. Just imagining being without him, she couldn't survive another day. "You can let me go..." She had to choke the words out and then pausing for a moment before she could continue. "Maybe...you can...but, I can't let you go...I'm- I'm not strong enough to do that... Edward, I loved you so much....it consumes me...This is all my fault....that you can't see that I'm yours and that's never going to change... My heart, my soul.....I don't want to live without you....." She wispered softlu realizing how stupid she sounded but she honestly didn't care at this point. she needed to show hit that she did mean what she was saying to him....

"I can still be in your life if you wish. The pain would fade eventually...Honestly, the one thing I can't handle is being the man that could eventually be in a one sided marriage. If you are going to continue to see him, if it is better for you, if you still want to stay with me, I won't mind as long as Ej is out of it." "This is your decision, I don't want you to put me or even him first. Please, take a moment to consider what you want. It will...'Soften the blow,' if you will, the sooner you tell me." This time she chose to say nothing, waiting until he finished with everything he had to say. And really, it was a good thing she didn't say anything for she knew that she would have no control over herself at this point. Edward was considering all of these things...Believing that she didn't love him and that she wanted to leave. She honestly had no idea what to say. It wasn't true....not at all but how was she supposed to make him see that..... "No...No..." She forced out shaking her head once again as she buried her face in his chest, she couldn't look at him and she didn't want him to see her. "I'm not going anywhere....p-please believe that.... I-I know that I've been horrible to you and I don't deserve you or Ej... But please...i-if you let me stay.... I..." She stopped, these next words would kill her to say but she had to "I'll never see Jacob again....."

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[Beauty]

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